Thursday, December 31, 2009

Welcome 2010

It was 10 years ago today that Chris proposed to me. Amidst all the Y2K chaos that night, he asked me to be his wife. That was a milestone for us. This next year will be full of events marking significance for us.
Seventeen years old & Seventeen years together. In March, Chris and I will celebrate our Dating Anniversary which we do every year, but this particular year will mark our seventeenth year together. I was seventeen when we started dating. I had an lived an entire lifetime before I met him! I lived my whole childhood before him. Now we've spent that same amount of time together as a couple where we've merged our lives and created our own family. It's a bit mind boggling for me, really. But pleasantly mind boggling.
I'll be turning 35 in April which I feel great about. My Aunt Hannah passed away from cancer at age 34 leaving behind her nine year old daughter, and this entire past year I've thought a lot about that. No one has any idea how grateful I am to be celebrating my 35th year. And I'm grateful for all that I've accomplished, acquired and been a part of to this point in my life. To celebrate my birthday, we're planning a trip to NYC... somewhere we've never been and we plan on leaving the kids at home with the Grandparents for the few days we're away... again another milestone for us. We've never been away from our kids for more than an overnight sleep over. We've never done a vacation away together without them ever. They're always with either Chris or myself. We love our kids and we like being with them. This will be an experience for us.
Of course 2010 also marks our 10 year Wedding Anniversary. We'll celebrate this in August and hopefully get back to British Columbia (WITH our kids!) which is where we spent most of our honeymoon after being in Alaska. The mountains and the ocean have taken my breath away before and I can't think of a better place to celebrate this anniversary.
So when I think about the decade that just passed us by I can smile knowing I made good use of those years. When I look ahead to what is before us, I can see there is a lot to look forward to.
Welcome 2010.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

My Christmas Spirit Spark

There was some questioning going on at my house this year about the reality of Santa. Carter told me some kids in his class and on the bus say Santa isn't real but his teacher told them "If you don't believe, you don't receive" My heart sank when he told me this. The few things I truly love about Christmas (and there isn't a whole lot that I truly love about Christmas I should mention) is the innocence, wonder and the magic of what might be. I told the boys my story again about when I was a little girl and saw Santa putting presents under my tree, thinking that would generate some conversation. Callum was the first to speak and asked me if I got less gifts that year because Santa caught me cheating... thanks Callum for putting a negative spin on a perfectly magical story. That question was followed by his statement "I'm staying up all night to watch for him and I'm gonna catch him on video like we did the Tooth Fairy!" He changed his mind once I told him I did in fact get less gifts that year for cheating and I felt a sense of sadness that I was straight faced lying to my kids for my own benefit. Carter could read in me that something about this conversation bothered me and so he put his arms around my neck and looked me in the eye. "Mom, you got the best present of all though... you got the gift of seeing Santa!" There was magic in his eyes. There was belief. There was innocence.
He warmed my heart so much that it was melting in that moment. The guilt I had only seconds before for lying faded and the magical feeling of Christmas finally hit me. Here I was desperately trying to preserve the magic of Christmas for them, but it actually took them to spark it in me. This may be the last year I see that magic and that belief in Carter's eyes and so I've etched it into my memory so I'll always have it to draw on as my Christmas spirit spark in the years ahead.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

You're The One True Thing I Know I Can Believe In

I really wasn't feeling the Christmas Spirt this year but my amazing husband stepped in and helped me pull it all together. There are a lot of songs that make me think of Chris and his awesomeness but this Sarah song Push is the one that describes us best I think.
"You're the one true thing I know I can believe in"

Every time I look at you the world just melts away
All my troubles all my fears dissolve in your affections
You've seen me at my weakest but you take me as I am
And when I fall you offer me a softer place to land

You stay the course you hold the line you keep it all together
You're the one true thing I know I can believe in
You're all the things that I desire, you save me, you complete me
You're the one true thing I know I can believe

I get mad so easy but you give me room to breathe
No matter what I say or do 'cause you're to good to fight about it
Even when I have to push just to see how far you'll go
You wont stoop down to battle but you never turn to go


Your love is just the antidote when nothing else will cure me
There are times I cant decide when I cant tell up from down
You make me feel less crazy when otherwise I'd drown
But you pick me up and brush me off and tell me I'm OK
Sometimes thats just what we need to get us through the day


Sunday, December 20, 2009

My Bridge

There are some people in my life who I know I was supposed to connect with in this life. One of those people is my friend Bridge. We met on the first day of college and we've been tight ever since. We're both really intuitive people and we can feel when things aren't right with one another, even if we haven't spoken in days.
Last night after dinner I had to lay down because I was feeling very overwhelmed with the thought of Christmas being only days away. I have such mixed emotions about this season as it is, so my anxiety got the best of me. I wasted the entire night in my bed thinking about how these next few days are going to look and worried about all that needs to be done. When I finally peeled myself out of bed this morning I got to it,  and told myself to get in the spirit for the love of my children. Everything has started to come together since then. I'm so fortunate to have such a wonderful husband. He helped me out with starting dinner, then took Callum to hockey.... two less things on my To Do List..... perfect.
While they were out I got a text message from Bridge out of the blue asking if everything is okay. But how did she know? How do we always know? She didn't send a text for any other reason except because she had a feeling something was up. She said all the right things to make me feel better....she has a very calming effect on me. Her voice and her words warms my soul every time I speak to her. She is one of those friends who tells me she loves me and I know she means it. I'm definitely feeling less overwhelmed now and am looking forward to having the 16 people I'm expecting for dinner this evening. As I set out my shiny happy silverware on the table, I thought about all the things Bridgette had said to me and it made my soul smile. She has the perfect name for someone who bridges chaos and calmness to create contentment. I love her as well, and I mean it too.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Just Breathe. Pearl Jam

Some songs just make me think of my awesome husband. This is one of them.I think we were together in our past lives. I hope we're together in our next life as well.

Yes I understand that every life must end, aw huh,..
As we sit alone, I know someday we must go, aw huh,..
I’m a lucky man to count on both hands
The ones I love,..

Some folks just have one,
Others they got none, aw huh,..

Stay with me,..
Let’s just breathe.

Practiced are my sins,
Never gonna let me win, aw huh,..
Under everything, just another human being, aw huh,..
Yeh, I don’t wanna hurt, there’s so much in this world
To make me bleed.

Stay with me,..
You’re all I see.

Did I say that I need you?
Did I say that I want you?
Oh, if I didn’t now I’m a fool you see,..
No one knows this more than me.
As I come clean.

I wonder everyday
as I look upon your face, aw huh,..
Everything you gave
And nothing you would take, aw huh,..
Nothing you would take,..
Everything you gave.

Did I say that I need you?
Oh, Did I say that I want you?
Oh, if I didn’t now I’m a fool you see,..
No one know this more than me.
As I come clean.

Nothing you would take,..
everything you gave.
Hold me till I die,..
Meet you on the other side.

Friday, December 11, 2009

The Work Holiday Party

I like going to our work Christmas Party because I'm a people watcher. I love to see how they interact with each other and study their behaviours. Some show up ready to party the night away while others appear to just want to get the night over with and get home again. Sometimes you get a glimpse of what people are really like outside of work and it's kinda cool. I also love to dance. I mean like high school slow dance, not bust-a-move on the dance floor kinda dance. My husband seldom dances (sometimes at a wedding if I'm lucky) and so it's only at such occasions that I have this opportunity. It's one of the few moments in life where everything sorta goes still for an entire 4ish minutes.... it's just me, someone kind enough to dance with me (as I hold my breath hoping he won't feel the line of my Spanx when he puts his hands at my back.... damn pregnancies) and the music. I don't usually dance at all at my work party but I enjoy watching who is dancing with who. It's especially entertaining to watch who goes home with who when it's all over. I always keep in mind it's still business even though they call it a "party". I can guarantee I'm not the only People Watcher in the room and so I'm very predictable and always on my best behaviour at these types of functions. And every year I go home with the same guy.... even if he doesn't ask me to dance.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Saroot Stole 'Em

As I was packing the kids lunches this morning Callum asked me for mini rice cakes again because he didn't get to eat his the other day. When I asked why, he told me "Saroot stole 'em!" He said he told the lunch monitor and that Saroot got in trouble.... he even got a detention after school. I asked Callum what he thought of that and to my delight he said "Maybe Saroot's mommy didn't buy rice cakes for his lunch and he just wanted some" So Callum wasn't angry. He has an understanding of why this boy would take from him. He wasn't feeling spiteful or happy that Saroot got a detention. Awesome.
I explained that the little boy should have asked Callum if he could have them and it's too bad that because he didn't use his words, he got in trouble. I suggested to Callum that we pack Saroot a little bag of rice cakes for himself today and Callum is feeling great about sharing with him.
It's hard to teach your kids about having empathy without having them turn out to be the people who get taken advantage of. It seems these boys of mine are on the right track so I'm gonna have to just let nature take it's course and watch how they choose to handle situations like this going forward.
As far as today goes, Callum and Saroot will each have rice cakes for snack and Callum is happy about that.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

To Be Fair, Buy Fair Trade!

I was grocery shopping this evenings and when I went to pick up bananas, I noticed there was a sign in the next section that said "Fair Trade Bananas" They were all of twenty cents more expensive per pound. Shouldn't all bananas be Fair Trade? Doesn't every human deserve to be paid at the very least what the minimum wage is for their local area? Why is it even legal to have non-fair-trade bananas? The same thing puzzles me about coffee. I know that buying organic has become sort of a trend in recent years, but people need to be made more aware of what it means to be buying Fair Trade over non-fair-trade and how buying Fair Trade on a regular basis will force the industry to pay the workers fairly. These hard working people are being exploited just so we can have our bananas and coffee at a measly twenty cents cheaper per pound?? It makes no sense to me and it really pisses me off! What is wrong with this world?! It's 2009... it really doesn't need to be this way.

Twenty-Nine Years Ago Today....

Sarah McLachlan is the only person I'd say in the world who should be allowed to cover John Lennon. This version of Happy Christmas makes my heart warm. I grew up listening to John Lennon. He was a part of my childhood and influenced many of the artists who I appreciate now.
It was on this day 29 years ago that I remember my father coming home early from work absolutely horrified by the news of John Lennon's death. He was shot in New York City December 8th, 1980 so I would have been 5 years old at the time and I'll never forget my father's reactions that day.... I'll never forget how sad he was.
R.I.P. Mr. John Lennon
Burn in Hell Mark David Chapman.
“You can take no credit for beauty at sixteen. But if you are beautiful at sixty, it will be your own soul's doing.”
Marie Stopes

Friday, December 4, 2009

Good Morning, Sunshine!

My Mommy instincts told me at 5:45 this morning that someone was awake and was standing at my bedroom door.
Me: "Morning Sunshine, are you okay?"
Callum: "Good Morning, Mommy, I just wanna have a snuggle with you"
He climbed into my bed and cuddled in close. Oh how this makes a mommy melt! He began telling me about his wiggly tooth, which led to a conversation about the dentist and the Tooth Fairy, which led to talking about Santa and how he must use a jet to get to all the malls and IKEA to have breakfast and pictures with all the kids because he has to go to so many of them... The conversations were delightful. Then, he used his little index finger and started tracing the letters printed on the shirt of my pj's. "Mom, what does this word say?" I told him it said Peace. "Mom, what does peace mean?"

This was it. This was my moment where I had an opportunity to speak to my young son about what peace means.... to me, anyways. He was quite intrigued and asked a lot of questions around the topic. We talked about war & soldiers & anti-violence, we talked about balance, we talked about friendships, unity, karma, behaviour and being good to all of mankind. It was a highly intellectual conversation to be having between a mommy and a five year old especially at that hour in the morning, but it thrilled me. The alarm went off at 6:30am so we got up and got on with our day, but I cannot express in words how much I enjoyed my unexpected little snuggle with Callum today. And I think my Peace pj's have just become my new favourites!

Animal Ingredients in Cosmetics

I've definitely become more "girly" since becoming a Mother. I'm the only female in my house and so I embrace all things girl these days. I like to wear a bit of make up and I feel better with a bit of make up on, but I don't feel like I HAVE to have a face on before leaving the house. (I have been teased by some Preschool Moms before for showing up without make up AND wearing Crocs, but I don't care. Some of those ladies are so fake anyways.) When I do put on some eyes or lips to go out, I'm very careful on which products I use. This is a good link that defines some lingo for animal derived ingredients in cosmetics.... I can't believe people would use this stuff!?!

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

I Couldn't Agree With You More, Maya Angelou.

“I have found that among its other benefits,
giving liberates the soul of the giver.”
Maya Angelou

Winter Is Coming & The Days Are Getting Shorter

Tonight at dinner Carter said "Mom, this dinner tastez really good! You're the best!" (It makes me feel so great when the kids say stuff like that to me!) Then he said "So, I guess you'll have to get dinner ready earlier now that the days are getting shorter and we won't be in school as long" He continued, "Now that it's almost winter and it's getting darker earlier, we'll be home from school sooner and you'll have to have dinner ready sooner too!"
I LOVE how kids take things so literally. So very innocent... so very sweet.

30 Reasons

Watch more videos at
Anyone who knows me, knows I'm spiritual but not religious. Listening to people saying grace at a dinner table makes me feel awkward but, I'd say Amen to this!

Don't "Bee" Cruel

We read a lot about animal cruelty but seldom do we come across information about Bees. I've taken this off the PETA site....
"Whether we are stealing honey, royal jelly, pollen, propolis, or wax from bees, these incredible little insects-capable of complicated communication documented in their dances and of a social network compared to which our most carefully designed modern communities pale, suffer and die quite needlessly.
First, smoke is blown into the bees’ hives to make the bees easier to deal with. Next, a “bee brush” is used to crudely sweep away the bees who rush from the hive and succumb to the smoke. In sweeping them aside, the wire tines break off their legs and wings. Bee farmers then remove the honey and the honeycomb, which is, of course, the hive’s main source of nourishment, and replace it with cheap white sugar. Animal wax used in candles (and certain other products, including some polishes, crayons and lip balms) comes from the honeycomb."
The rest of this article can be found on the PETA site.

Sunday, November 29, 2009 News: Story: Family turned upside down News: Story: Family turned upside down

This article is about one of Carter's really good buddies who has been in his class since JK. It is the "shortened" version of what was printed in the paper. Breaks my heart....

As I read through Adam's article today it reminded me what Shelley (Adam's Mom) has to deal with on a daily basis and how they as a family make it all work. She has good reason to get frustrated and yet I've never seen it in her. She always seems so patient, so optimistic and so together. The doctors say "Adam has an 85% chance of beating this cancer completely and a 100% chance of showing the people around him that life is a joy" This most definitely, is a reflection of how positive and wonderful his family is...

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

I feel this way and Chris feels this way.... but not always about what each other cooks!

“Cooking itself is sexy and smart. In the right hands, it can inspire and express as much emotion and love as music, dance or poetry. It can give you joy, hope and laughter and it can energize your soul and spirit.”
Jewels and Jill Elmore

Saturday, November 21, 2009

I Can Be Read Like An Open Book...

I've often been told I can be read like an open book because of my facial expressions. I also wear my heart on my sleeve so if I like you, you'll know it.
Today I had a "Face Reading" done which was pretty interesting. Here's what I learned my face says....

I make people feel comfortable because I can adapt to their needs.... I mirrored the guys body language when he suggested we get started.
When I squint when I'm listening it's because I am taking it all in, but processing the information in my own way and deciding how I feel about it. When my eyes are wide open or my eyebrows are raised it's because the information doesn't really need to be processed... it's more of entertainment information and I take it as it is.
The slope of my nose means I'm very direct with how I shoot out information to people. I tell it like it is but once I reflect on what I've said, I worry about how they've interpreted it and have to go back and explain what I really meant to say..... THIS IS SOOOO ME!
My jawline says I'm a person who can be told to do a task and I get the job done. I can be counted on. (awwww! Love that!)
I'm a thinker. The lines in my forehead mean I have multiple conversations going on in my head at the same time. I can block them out if I'm in a deep conversation with someone which brings some relief to me... which is probably why I LOVE going for lunch/coffee/dinner/beers with friends because it gives me a break away from the chaos of thoughts going through my head.
My lip line tells him I should always follow my gut instinct. I am a person that can be persuaded to do something even though my gut tells me not to.... he says I need to follow my gut. OKAY.
The first and last thing he talked to me about is that I am "a radiant being of empathy." HOW COOL IS THAT?? He said it's written all over my face.

I'm not so sure how I feel when people tell me they can read me like an open book or that I wear my heart on my sleeve, but if what they are reading is that I'm a Radiant Being of Empathy, then thats all good! lol ; )

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Kisses & Love

Carter has started to comment about certain boys at school having "girlfriends" and how so and so "kissed each other" It's really quite comical how they interpret affection at such a young age, aside from what they know as being normal amongst family members. Even in high school, a sign of affection meant something BIG; it was a possibility. If a guy were to kiss you, like on the cheek kiss you, it could mean this is leading somewhere. If the word LOVE ever came up, you might as well consider yourself married and if it came from a girlfriend then you just might be a lesbian.... but it was up to your friends to come to a conclusion. Basically, you just avoid all signs of affection unless you were really into someone. It's confusing. I can see why Carter is all talk about this.

It's funny how that all changes as you age and as you mature. My girlfriends and their husbands would never leave my house without giving me good bye kisses. If I drop them off at home after being out... thank you kisses. If we run into each other unexpectedly..... happy to see you kisses. If we show up at each others places unannounced.... welcome kisses. When we meet at a restaurant for dinner.... glad you could make it kisses. If something sad happens.... so sorry kisses. There is no thinking twice about it. It's an expectation.

And the word Love is used more openly as an adult, I think because it goes hand in hand with the word Respect. My friends and I say I love you a lot. And we mean it. It's so great when you get to this point in your life where our nervousness, ego and guard can be let down and you can show people how you really feel about them without any awkwardness. Trying to explain this to someone as young as Carter just wouldn't make sense. Trying to explain it to anyone who isn't in a committed relationship probably couldn't make sense of it either, now that I think about it. You almost have to go through all the motions and emotions before you really get it. You have to feel grounded, solid and secure of yourself and your relationships. I believe it comes with age. Guess I'll have to wait til he is 30-something and giving congratulations kisses, good by kisses etc etc to his friends spouses before he will truly understand how it all works. For now, it seems he is too busy with playground weddings for this kind of talk so it'll have to wait.

You May Say I'm A Dreamer....

Every year as we approach the Holiday Season, the words to John Lennon's Imagine start filling my head more often than any other time of the year. It's my all-time favourite song but I think about it more around this time with feelings of anxiety.
I'm gearing up to go on my annual Girls Shopping in the USA Weekend next week, which I love and look forward to. While we make time for fun, we go there on a mission to get as much Christmas shopping done as possible. As I make my list of what I need to get and who I need to buy for, I always struggle with ideas... because none of these people really need anything. When I hear the words in my favourite song, I think about what all this money could go towards and how many people could really benefit from it. There are people in this world without clean drinking water, and I'm struggling to remember which Transformers my kids said they needed in order to have the entire set!?! My boys are living a very materialistic childhood, very similar to the one in which I grew up and I feel very off balance by it all. We are a family who goes to the fire station every year with new toys for the Toy drive, we donate to charities & food banks and we contribute to our community through organizations our children are involved in.... but those things are not what will bring balance to this whole Christmas madness for me. I'm not religious so it's not about the over commercialization of Christmas and loss of meaning that bothers me so much.... it's about having far more than we really need in life in general. We should be sharing the wealth with the countries that don't know how to grow their own food, need medications and educations and who would truly benefit from the money we blow on unnecessary things each and every day of the year... not just at Christmas. I guess it bothers me more at this time of year because of how much extra we shell out on such material things. I've got some thinking to do.... because something is going to have to change in how we do Christmas in the years to come. I want to be able to say Happy Holidays and really mean it. And really feel it. Imagine?


Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

John Lennon

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Let your vision be from your heart and then listen from your soul (via @healwithangels)
What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. ~Yiddish Proverb

Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. ~Jack Handey, "Deep Thoughts,"Saturday Night Live

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

There's More To Life Than Being A Passenger (Amelia)

I remember being in the grade school choir singing "Sky Happy" in a play we did about Amelia Earhart. I used to run the scenes through my head long after we finished the play because I loved the story so much. She was a woman who really understood herself and her dreams in a time when that wasn't well accepted by society. She was full of confidence and inner strengths. I think every woman can take something positive for themselves out of her inspiring story. I've just learned there is a movie out about her life.... I don't make a habit of telling people they should do anything, but everyone should go see this!

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Smoocheroo, I Love You!

It's our "thing"... it's what we do, it's what we say... "Smoocheroo, I Love You!" First thing in the morning we say it, when they get on and off the school bus or when I leave for work we say it. It's our thing. I just said it one day when Carter was really really little, and it has stuck ever since. If I'm in a hurry and try to just yell it up the stairs to the boys before leaving the house, they freak out and come running because they tell me you can't just say Smoocheroo, I Love You, you have to DO Smoocheroos too, and thats where I get my little boy kisses that I love so much.

I've often thought about what things will look like when my boys grow up and wish I could just freeze time right now for a little while longer. I know they won't stay little for long and so I really, really enjoy my kids. Some people aren't fortunate to realize this until it's too late and they miss out. I find comfort in knowing I'll have no regrets there. I do worry that once the kids grow and have their own lives, schedules and even families that what I have now will be gone. Will they want to come running to me to tell me about their day? Will they have a big smoocheroo for me in return when I kiss them as adults? Who really knows, but I have hope because of what I heard someone say the other day.

He is a grown 25 year old guy who was giving me a run down of what he figured his Friday night was going to look like. He had a blind date but said he hadn't seen his Mom in days because they had both been so busy and told me very casually he just wanted to run home first to kiss her and check in on her before heading out.... From a Mom perspective, those words make a mommy melt!! MELT! OMG! It can happen! They can grow up and still love their mommies like little boys are supposed to! Obviously his Mom did her job well and I'm hoping my boys feel I am too. I won't expect them to say "Smoocheroo, I Love You" at that age but if I can get the love, respect and acknowledgement his Mom gets from him.... I'll know I raised them right!

Thursday, October 29, 2009

“Beauty is...elusive and eternal. It is many things: strength, confidence, passion, grace—a sense of style, a turn of head, a state of mind.”
Rona Berg

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

A life without cause is a life without effect. via Twitter @greensisters @paulocoelho #quote

This is so true... so very true!

When your thoughts are completely filled with positive purpose, there is no room for fear. ( via twitter @luvnnature )

Inner Peace

I had a conversation with friends on the weekend on Inner Peace. Clearly they haven't spent nearly enough time contemplating what that might mean to them as there were a few jokes made about it and of course "Jenn thinks too much" blah blah blah.

I believe Inner Peace means something different to everyone. For me, it's all about balance, boundries, fulfillment and gratitude amongst other things. It's an experience of knowing oneself and it can only come from within. Filling your mind with positive thoughts, living with simplicity & gratitude and being aware of how you and your actions impact this world, can all contribute to creating this state of consciousness..... in my opinion anyways.

My beautiful friend Susie, sent me this email today....


I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me today, and we
all could probably use more calm in our lives! Some doctor on the TV this
morning said that the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you
have started. So I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't
finished and, before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of
Merlot, a bottle of shhhardonay, a bodle of Baileys, abutle of vocka, a pockage
of Pringlies, the res of the Chesescke a n a box a chocolets. Yu haf no idr ow
frigin gud I fel. Peas sen dis orn to anyy yu fee ar in ned ov inr pece.

So, she passed it onto me. Nice. I have wonderful friends. Hilarious, they are.... spiritual they are not.

Monday, October 26, 2009

X-Ray In Two Languages

Carter, who has begun learning cursive writing at school, was showing Callum how he can print and write. He wrote the word x-ray twice, printing it once then handwritten the second time. He then proudly said "See Callum, I can write x-ray in two different languages."

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Where Have All The Flowers Gone?

Some might call them weeds. Not I. These yellow beauties that pop up all over my grass during the summer are sometimes the highlight of my day.

When I send my boys out to play, they pick them for me. They come running into the house with big bright smiles on their adorable little faces saying, "Mom! Mom! These are for you!!" They are full of pride when they hand them over and it makes me happy to know they are learning how wonderful it feels to give. I even have a special Dandelion vase that magnets to the fridge where I can keep them in water. (Yes, I keep my "weeds" in water.)

I do love Fall but now that Summer has come to an end, the Dandelions gifts from my kids are few and far between. I am treasuring every last one I get these days.

Ellen Rapping

Thursday, October 22, 2009

I had this sent to me in an email today.... I like it.


When I stand up for
Myself and my beliefs,
They call me

When I stand up for
Those I love,
They call me a


When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts
Or do things my own way, they call me a


Being a
Means I won't
Compromise what's

In my heart.
It means I live my life MY
It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to
Tolerate injustice and
Speak against it, I am
Defined as a


The same thing happens when I take time for
myself instead of being everyone's maid, or when I act a little selfish.

It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I 'should' be...

I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!

So try to stomp on me, just try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce
of beauty I hold within me.
You won't succeed.

And if that makes me a
bitch, so be it.
I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.

B - Babe
I - In
T - Total
C - Control of
H - Herself

B = Beautiful
I = Intelligent
T = Talented
C = Charming
H = Hell of a Woman

B = Beautiful
I = Individual
T = That
C = Can
H = Handle 'anything'

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

@lifecruise "If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?" - Abraham Lincoln (Love this!)

They paved paradise and put up a parkin' lot
With a pink hotel, a boutique, and a swingin' hot spot
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got till it's gone
They paved paradise and put up a parkin' lot

They took all the trees, and put em in a tree museum
And they charged the people a dollar and a half to see them
No, no, no, don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got till it's gone
They paved paradise, and put up a parkin' lot

Hey farmer, farmer, put away your DDT
I don't care about spots on my apples,
Leave me the birds and the bees - please
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got till it's gone
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot
Hey now, they've paved paradise to put up a parking lot
Why not?

Listen, late last night, I heard the screen door swing,
And a big yellow taxi took my girl away
Now don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got till it's gone
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot
Hey now now, don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got till it's gone
They paved paradise to put up a parking lot
Why not, they paved paradise
They put up a parking lot
Hey hey hey, paved paradise and put up a parking lot

I don't wanna give it
Why you wanna give it
Why you wanna givin it all away
Hey, hey, hey
Now you wanna give it
I should wanna give it
Cuz you're givin it all away, no no

I don't wanna give it
Why you wanna give it
Why you wanna givin it all away
Cuz you're givin it all givin it all away yeah yeah
Cuz You're givin it all away hey, hey, hey

Hey, paved paradise, to put up a parking lot
la,la, la, la, la, la, la ,la ,la ,la ,la
Paved paradise, and put up a parking lot

Save The Seals-Jennie Garth

Celebrities Speak Out Against the Seal Slaughter. Learn More.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Gotta Love Alicia

Alicia Silverstone has written a new book called The Kind Diet, promoting vegetarianism and saving the planet. Click here to read the interview she did for the Huffington Post.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

You Da Meanest Mommy Evah!!

Yep. I've heard it before and I'm sure I'll hear it again. "You da meanest Mommy evah!" (Callum) and "Wutz you pwobwem anyways?" (Kaitlyn) and also "I'm so sick of you" (courtesy of Kaitlyn again) I have heard these words come from the mouths of the children I love and devote my life to.

Today we spent the afternoon at the SPCA animal shelter at my neice's birthday party. It was a great place for the kids to be as they can really learn a lot about compassion, giving and gratitude at a place like that. There were so many dogs, cats and other animals waiting to be adopted. It was hard to read all of the little blurbs posted on each of their kennels about where they came from, their characteristics and why they are there. Although they are all very unique in their own way, they all had in common their search for a "Forever Home."

I clearly explained to my family before going in, that we were NOT going to be bringing a pet home today. We have had a dog before and I was not ready to have another one yet. Admittedly, my heart sank a little as I watched my kids (especially Callum) gaze at the pets as they walked past each cage.

We successfully left empty handed but not without a struggle. I was expecting to hear the children tell me I was the meanest Mommy ever. I was expecting them to put up a fuss about not getting a pet, even though they were warned ahead of time. But they didn't. It is my husband who is giving me a hard time!! The mood he has been in since leaving there and the lines he has thrown at me in reaction to us leaving empty handed is unbelievable. He basically had all the dogs he would like to have picked out and all I had to do was choose one. Wasn't that sweet of him? He was letting ME choose!?! How very considerate of him! His behaviour was worse than any of the children's and his arguments for wanting to get a dog today were very weak. I am the one who will be home with it all day and a new dog is like having another baby in the house. I already do home daycare... I don't need to have another baby around right now. I am the one who would have to walk it and be home for it. We wouldn't be able to take off for weekends away without planning for someone to take it. I hardly ask anyone to baby-sit for me. Just how am I supposed to ask for someone to dog-sit for me? I am not ready to make these commitments yet. One of these days, far, far from today, I imagine we will once again have a dog in the house but today is not that day.

Animal lover he is. Push over I am not. Guess today I'm da meanest wife EVAH!!

Saturday, October 17, 2009

I Have A Lot To Be Thankful For

This photo was taken Thanksgiving Day at my in-laws place. We all got together for dinner and you could see in my MIL's face how important that was for her to have everyone gathered together. She did a quick toast to us all telling us how lucky she is to have such a wonderful family.

For the past 5 years, Chris and I haven't left the house on Christmas Day. We decided that it is the only day of the year that Santa comes and to tear them away from their new stuff they just got and rush around all day, was not going to happen. This obviously has caused mayhem each and every year but as we explained to everyone, there are many days over the holidays to get together and there are a number of other occasions throughout the year to have dinner as a family. This one day each year was to be a day at home in our pj's, a day to play, a day to take in the magic and avoid the chaos of a child's Christmas. As children, Chris and I both remember opening our gifts, then rushing to get ready to go somewhere and wear itchy, dressy, uncomfortable clothing. On the years we were hosting at our house, my mum couldn't get to the kitchen fast enough after opening gifts and she really missed out on the day by cooking it away. Call us selfish, call us untraditional but we are happy we did what we did. My only regret is that our absence caused some hurt feelings towards some of the most important people in our lives. If they don't already realize, then I hope they'll someday understand why we did what we did.

Two years ago, I promised my mother-in-law we would start venturing out on Christmas day again, the year Callum turned five. So, this is it. We're going there Christmas Day this year. As we've been approaching the holiday season, I was starting to feel like maybe we shouldn't have made that commitment just yet. Maybe we should be staying home for at least another year, but after being at her house for Thanksgiving, I'm glad we're going. Our boys are older now and they are ready to experience the chaos Christmas brings. My MIL is very proud of her family and has been looking forward to this year for a long time. The closer we get now, the more I'm looking forward to it as well. I will NOT be dressing my kids in itchy, dressy, uncomfortable clothing though.

What If Environmentalists Had Written Star Wars?

If Star Wars had been written by environmentalists, it would look like this.
"Kindness should become the natural way of life, not the exception." (Buddha)
via twitter @vegan_one

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Kyle David Miller 2002-2005

The Importance Of A Five Point Harness is a very powerful video. I had Callum in a booster when I first viewed this video but went out and got the seat in the video once I realized there was one for his size on the market. I often go back and watch it as it puts things in perspective for me. My son was born only a few days before Kyle and when I get angry at him for little things and for little reason, I remember this video and how lucky I am to have my boys. The Miller's have put together a new video of Kyle and it is equally as sad but beautiful to watch. RIP little Kyle David Miller.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

“We begin to find and become ourselves when we notice how we are already found, already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be.”
Anne Lamott

Monday, October 12, 2009

“Dressing is a way of life. It brings you joy. It can give you freedom and liberation, help you to find yourself and to move without restraint. Isn't elegance forgetting
what one is wearing?”
Yves Saint Laurent

Mother-Roger Waters & Sinead O'Connor

Shame On You-Indigo Girls!!

Thursday, October 8, 2009

“Health is wholeness and balance, an inner resilience that allows you to meet the demands of living without being overwhelmed.”
Andrew Weil, MD

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Apple Dip

2 cups of plain cream cheese
1 cup of brown sugar
1 tsp of vanilla
(Beat these ingredients together)
Place in a serving dish and top with caramel sauce and Skor
(I use Smuckers Caramel Topping and Skor bits, sold in the aisle where the chocolate chips are. Alternatively, smash up 4 Skor bars and use those)

Serve with sliced green apples. Yuuuuuuummmmmy!

Monday, October 5, 2009

So, I Might Just Be Wholesome Afterall.

A fairly new friend told me last week that he didn't believe me when I said the only thing fake about me is my nails. He claims "no one can be that..... wholesome!"

The word "wholesome" sorta stunned me at first because if he thought I was putting on some sort of persona for what ever reason, I was surprised he viewed it as being "wholesome." I have no one in this world that I need to impress except my children and my husband. I am a social person and I like to be liked but I certainly don't need to be liked. There is a difference. I want to be a role model for my kids but I don't try to be someone I'm not. I'd say I "found myself" way back when I was twenty-ish and haven't changed much since then. Either he doesn't know me well enough yet or he's just never met anyone like me. (I was born in the 70's hippy era so could that have an impact on who I am today? lol)

I was confused by what wholesome really meant so I looked it up. (I know..... loser!)
This is what I found on Merrium-Webster Online....

Main Entry: whole·some
Pronunciation: \ˈhōl-səm\
Function: adjective
Date: 13th century

1 : promoting health or well-being of mind or spirit
2 : promoting health of body
3 a : sound in body, mind, or morals b : having the simple health or vigor of normal domesticity

The more I look at these meanings, the more I realize it does describe me. It echos how I live my life. I'm not perfect, I have bad days, I have skeletons in my closet and I do get frustrated but generally speaking I try to be a positive person. I do not have a true hatred for anyone and I'm always looking to do things that are good for my soul. I don't know if these are the same qualities my new friend saw in me and doubted, but the more I think about it, I wonder if I might just be wholesome afterall, damn it!

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Inspirational Website

This is a very cool website..... search through the quotes..... really inspiring.

We Remember The Days....

Susie & I have been friends since high school. We used to dream together what our houses were going to look like and all the nice things we'd have in them. Then, our oldest boys were born (two weeks apart!) and we would put the babies in the strollers, go to the mall and shop. Shop, shop, shop. Every Wednesday. We'd have lunch and coffee that was HOT.... That was a great year.

We now have 5 children between the two of us and life has changed. Our outings are very different. In fact, we usually prefer "in ings" where we just get together at each others places, stay in and let the children run wild. We take turns doing this because our places get so trashed that it often takes days to recover from such get togethers. We have to heat and re-heat our coffees because we are constantly being interrupted and distracted. These gatherings are complete mayhem. But we continue to do them. Like ourselves, our kids are all good buddies.

This past month has been a bt of a turning point for me. Both of my kids are in school and so are the kids I have been providing child care to for the past 5 years. I have some new found freedom. The other day, I stopped by Susie's place (who also does home daycare and her youngest is almost 2 now) while the little ones were asleep and all the older kids were in school. I walked into total silence.... for the first time in 7 years, it was quiet. We took a minute to enjoy that sound as we drank our HOT coffees. (which all moms know is a treat!) I went to place my coffee down on her table and this is how her table looked. Her table that I remember her proudly telling me she got for her new place many years ago..... One of those "nice things" we had dreamt about for our houses back in our before children days. I commented on how I like what she has done with the furniture and walls.... we laughed, then sorta cried for a quick second then laughed again. Would we have it any other way? Would we really want to go back to the days of before children and have those perfect homes we once almost had? Not a chance. (but going back to drinking coffee while it's hot on a regular basis would be great!)

The Apple Of My Eye (one of them!)

Apple Picking is something I take the kids to do every year. It's one of my favourite things to do in Autumn!

Saturday, October 3, 2009

How Sweet It Is To Be Loved By Carter

When Carter got off the school bus, he had his hand in his vest as if he were hiding something. From his adorable smiling face I knew it must be innocent and then he told me to wait til we get to the door because he has a surprise for me.

From his vest, he pulled out this flower and said with much enthusiasm and excitement "Mum! I found this for you at school!"

Judging by the root, I'm guessing he found it in the garden at school... still growing!!

Nevertheless, how sweet it is to be loved by him!

Friday, October 2, 2009

“He who has health has hope,
and he who has hope has everything.”
Arabian proverb
“Above all, style begins with a sense of who you are
and your self-confidence.”
Kate Spade
“Our essential purpose is to
become the best version of ourselves.”
Matthew Kelly

About Me

My photo
Life-long Vegetarian and proud to be Canadian. Really, I'm a little bit of everything, all rolled into one. I'm a bitch, I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother, I'm a sinner, I'm a saint (I do not feel ashamed) I'm your hell, I'm your dream (I'm nothing in between) You know, I wouldn't want it any other way..... (I'd like to think that song was written about me! lol)